The Not So Magnificent Seven

After such a good start to October I somehow managed to while away the rest of the month without seeing another film, and even worse, without making use of my trusty Cineworld Card.

Desperately trying to catch up with what I'd missed, and make use of my card, I somehow managed to cram 7 films into 3 days.

I'm not going to say a great deal on all of them but I thought a brief run down of my thoughts was required.

We shall start with the first film I saw - The Hate U Give



Incredibly important film about the current Black Lives Matter movement in the US, and the frequency with which unarmed black men are being killed by white police officers. This isn't based on a true story but it could so easily be based on any number of accounts of exactly the same situation as what happens in this film.

A strong central performance from Amanda Stenberg makes this film stand out from the crowd. It's both eye opening and incredibly moving in parts. Definitely worth a watch if it's still on near you. 7/10

Film 2 was the rather lacklustre Venom. 

Disappointingly neither Tom Hardy or Riz Ahmed are at their best here. And is it just me or is Michelle Williams acting actually getting worse (and is she becoming more breathy sounding) with each passing year? The effects are kinda ropey in places, and ultimately it leaves you wondering ‘did this film need to be made’? The end credits glimpse at the new Animated Spider-Man feature film looks great though it has to be said. 5/10

The third film I saw was Bohemian Rhapsody. I have a LOT to say about this one so it’s getting a separate review. Keep your eyes peeled for that!

Film four was the overlong and incredibly boring First Man. 

If Ryan Gosling can’t make your lead character interesting and charismatic then I think your film has problems. If this film is genuinely based on truth then I’m sorry to say that Neil Armstrong is a very dull man. The director needed reining in on the running time of this beast, and I think other characters should have been given more of a chance to shine. We know he gets to the moon so why did it take so damn long to show it?

This is by no means a bad film. The acting is top notch and I can certainly see Oscar nominations rocketing towards this one, but it's incredibly long and tediously, and just boring, and therefore I can only give it 4/10.

The fifth film I saw was the first of a horror triple bill - Slaughterhouse Rulez.

I will admit that from the trailer I was fully expecting this to be a slight step up from a Goosebumps type movie but it fell somewhere between that and a real gore fest. I enjoyed it, even if the acting isn’t always top notch, it was a fun ride and a perfect post Halloween movie. 6/10

The penultimate movie of the triple (and indeed the not-always-so-magnificent 7) was Goosebumps 2. 

I know I saw the last Goosebumps movie but I’ll be honest, I don’t remember much about it. This one was loads of fun. The possessed dummy was just the right amount of creepy for a kids film, and considering this definitely WAS made for kids (it’s a PG cert) I thought it was more engaging than Slaughterhouse. I found myself enjoying it a lot more and just generally having a blast. Definitely recommend for those with kids looking for a spooky film this autumn. 7/10

Finally that leads me to him. He came home. And what a bloody and fitting end to the Halloween franchise this is (providing the powers that be don’t decide to make another one).



Jamie Lee Curtis’ Laurie Strode from the original 1978 Halloween (that's right kids, that's before even I was born) returns for this sequel which effectively erases every Halloween movie that has followed in the last 40 years (including Halloween 2, H20 and Resurrection which all also featured Curtis as Laurie Strode). Forget those movies exist because this is the definitive sequel. Strode has spent the last 40 years dealing with PTSD over what happened on that fateful Halloween night, and my god has she got her Sarah Conner on.

Strode has always known the day would come when Michael Myers would again escape the mental facility that houses him, and she has prepared for the day when she would once again face him.

I won't give any spoilers away but I will say that for fans of the original this is an absolute must see. I will admit that I am nowhere near as hardcore horror as I used to be and I was scared to see this on my own, which is why I waited to see it until someone could come with me. But it's not wall to wall horror as some would have you believe.

Sure there are jump scares, and to bring the franchise bang up to date there are some scenes that are truly gruesome and horrific, but this is a Halloween movie, would you really expect anything less? Curtis and co act their socks off. It's great to see so many strong women in this movie, rather than them just being the screaming victim all the time, and for a woman in her 60s, Jamie Lee Curtis is as bad ass as they come.

As a huge fan of the original I honestly can't recommend Halloween highly enough to fellow fans. See it before it finishes in cinemas. 9/10

Terminator Genisys

http://www.terminatormovie.com/#home

I've been a fan of the Terminator series for a long time, probably longer than I should have been given that I was 4 when the original was released. I was recalling the other day how I used to have the iconic poster of Arnie on the motorbike from T2 on my wall when I was about 12, but looking at the 1991 release date I must have only been 10. Crazy stuff.

Although I don't believe I got to see T2 in the cinema as I was definitely too young, I do remember seeing The Terminator as I managed to catch it in 2011 when it was shown at The Duke of Yorks as part of a Cameron double with Aliens. My review can be found here if you're interested. I loved getting to see the first film on the big screen, even if it was somewhat spoiled by the fact that Dukes were clearly showing a very scratched DVD that kept jumping and freezing. I suppose it just added to the nostalgic atmosphere of the evening...

Anyway, enough backstory, I am a big Terminator fan, you get it, I even like Salvation, which most people hate. When I heard they were making another film I was quite happy about it as I assumed it was going to carry on the timeline from Salvation, but for those who have avoided reading any reviews for Genisys (as I did), I can tell you now that it does not. 

Genisys starts out by showing an alternative meeting between a child Kyle Reese and an adult John Connor. John saves Kyle from a Terminator who was without doubt going to kill him (and probably his dog too), and so owing John his life, and idolising his mentor, he follows John into the resistance movement against Skynet. Skip to some years later and John has finally discovered where they are keeping their time travel device that they are planning to use to send the original T800 back to 1984 to kill Sarah Connor. He asks for a volunteer to go back and save his mother, and of course, Kyle offers to tackle the task. 

Here is where the story differs from the original as we now have a new timeline that Kyle travels back to, it's new because a T800 was already sent back to protect a 9 year old Sarah Connor from a T1000. The same type of shape shifting liquid metal terminator that was sent to kill John in T2. Following? Sarah's parents were killed by the T1000 just as John's foster parents were in T2, and so the T800 became her guardian. They bonded over time, and now they are a badass duo who are waiting for Kyle, and not only for Kyle, but for the T800 coming to kill Sarah, and they destroy him before he's even able to steal some clothes from the punks he attacks in the first film!

If you're familiar (and I mean very familiar) with Terminator 1 and 2 you'll be fine but I really feel this will be a stretch for anyone who doesn't know these movies well. No longer needing to be rescued, Sarah shows Kyle the time machine that her and 'pops' (as she calls the protector T800) have been working on, in order to go back to the 1996 'Judgement Day' and stop Skynet before it goes online. But Kyle has other ideas due to some flashbacks he had when he was travelling back to 1984 that take a bit of explaining before they make sense. 

You can get your head around it but it does help if you know the originals really well. 

I didn't really have any issues with the story, it made sense to me for the most part, the action set pieces kept the excitement amped up, but for me it was the casting that failed to hold up. I think it was always going to be tough to compete with the original because you're going head to head here. This isn't about casting a younger or older version of a character, this is about re-creating them at the exact moment that the original was set. 

They all tried their best, but try as they did, Emilia Clarke is too brunette and too short to be the Linda Hamilton Sarah Connor that's in my head, and Jai Courtney is too bulky and too dumb to be Kyle Reese. Hamilton had such an innocence about her in the first film and I get that all of that is supposed to be gone for this version of Sarah because she's been brought up by a terminator, but she should still essentially LOOK the same right? Same goes for Courtney, as soon as he started stripping off for the time travel capsule I couldn't help but think 'uh, he's too muscly'! Maybe that's just me, like I said, they all put in good performances, but for me the casting just wasn't right for the 3 main roles (Arnie aside obviously). I like Jason Clarke but he wasn't John Connor for me. 

Overall there are some nice nods to the original, the director certainly nailed those early scenes that mirror the first film, and some moments of 'oh this is good', mostly whenever J.K. Simmons was on screen. But mostly it fell oddly flat. There was also a distinct lack of chemistry between Clarke and Courtney which I am sure didn't help those scenes where you should be feeling something building between them. An okay but by no means the be all and end all of Terminator movies, 6.5 out of 10.

Viewing Date: 4th July 2015

Release Date: 2nd July 2015

Cast Overview:

Arnold Schwarzenegger ~ Guardian

Emilia Clarke ~ Sarah Connor

Jason Clarke ~ John Connor

Jai Courtney ~ Kyle Reese

J.K. Simmons ~ O'Brien

Davo Okenivi ~ Danny Dyson

Matt Smith ~ Alex 

Courtney B Vance ~ Miles Dyson

Byung-Hun Lee ~ Cop/T1000

Director ~ Alan Taylor

Writer ~  Laeta Kalogridis and Patrick Lussier. Characters by James Cameron and Gale Anne Hurd.

Zero Dark Thirty

http://www.zerodarkthirty-movie.com/

Zero Dark Thirty was not a movie that I anticipated seeing, or wanting to see, when I first heard about it. As much as the story seemed like an interesting one  there was no particular element that drew me in. Sure, The Hurt Locker was an amazing feat but was that just down to the charisma of the leading man? This was going to be another film set in the middle east for Kathryn Bigelow and I wasn't sure she could pull this one off if I'm honest.

It wasn't until two of my best friends stepped in that I started to change my mind. One of my friends, who's based in the US, went to see the film before it was released here and raved about it. Then, in a move that surprised me and rocked my very foundations, my bff here suggested we go to see it. This is a girl more likely to cry at disney movies than I am, wanting to go see a film about Bin Laden? Well alrighty then!

For those who think this is all Zero Dark Thirty is, allow me to elaborate. The story actually centers on a group of CIA operatives who, over the course of a decade, are trying to locate Bin Laden by any means necessary. This involves some interrogation of those affiliated with him, tracking his couriers across Afghanistan and performing high level surveillance of houses they believed he occupied. All of this eventually leading to his believed location and a mission carried out by Navy SEALs to hunt him down.

In the forefront of all of this action, and I suppose this is where the story really surprises a lot of people, is a woman. Maya, played by the impeccable Jessica Chastain, starts out as a fairly reserved character, watching, listening, taking advice, all the while learning about the enemy and how best to defeat him. Over time she becomes stronger and more able to make the tough decisions than the men around her and eventually comes out victorious after 10 long years. But this is a Kathryn Bigelow movie. It's not about winning the war, it's about what the war takes from you. And this is why Kathryn Bigelow was the perfect person to take on this project. Not because it's a story with a strong female lead. We know from Bigelow's previous films that she directs men as well, if not better than, women. No, the real reason she was perfect for this film is because she is able to tell a story about the aftermath of war, as much as she capable of showing us the war itself.

A lot has been said about the torture scenes in this film but I actually found them to be quite mild. Anyone who has seen Rendition, the movie with Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal, will know a hard hitting torture scene when they see one. I have long been a fan of gory horror movies but even I found some of those scenes hard to stomach. By comparison I didn't feel like the torture scenes in this movie were that bad. And they were necessary to show the evolution of Maya's character. 

I would definitely recommend seeing Zero Dark Thirty, even if it's not the type of film you would normally see. I guarantee that whatever you think you know about this film is not a true representation of what you get out of seeing it. So go see it. 8 out of 10.

Viewing Date - 2nd February 2013

UK Release Date - 11th January 2013 

Cast Overview:

Jessica Chastain ~ Maya

Jason Clarke ~ Dan

Joel Edgerton ~ Patrick

Mark Strong ~ George Wright

Jennifer Ehle ~ Jessica

Kyle Chandler ~ Joseph Bradley

Chris Pratt ~ Justin

Taylor Kinney ~ Jared

Stephen Dillane ~ National Security Advisor

Harold Perrineau ~ Jack

James Gandolfini ~ Leon Panetta

Director ~ Kathryn Bigelow

Writer ~ Mark Boal